It’s not that I don’t know that life is unfair.  It’s just that I often wish that life could be more fair.

Today I want to be mad at God
because I’m really mad at the world
and at bodies that don’t always work
and at unfairness and burdens that are too heavy
and at reality occasionally being an unfeeling bitch
with big sharp teeth and who doesn’t care about
youth and innocence and playing with friends
Because today a friend heard big words that will soon
have more meaning for her than they do for me
but right now I know that bodies don’t always work
and reality is mean and the world unfair
and that if I could be mad at God then
I could yell and scream and know that someone
listened
and God would listen if I yelled and screamed
but it would be for me and after I would still
be mad at the world which will not ever listen

written 4-10-2010

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